Life Imitates Politics

So here's how it must have gone down:

Todd, Sarah and the fam were sitting around the breakfast table enjoying their Canada (that foreign country Sarah has visited on policy fact-finding tours) goose egg and wolf bacon omelets when Bristol asked, "Mom, is it true?"

Sarah: "Is what true, of course you realize that true is the new false according to the national media by that I mean lower 48 or is it 47, so don't waste your life just feeding the idea that your baby is loved any less than that."

Bristol: "That Dad's making you quit."

Sarah: "Not tomorrow, if you ask me." 

Bristol: "I am asking you."

Sarah: "Well as Lady MacBeth wrote in her play, 'Shakespeare', 'If it were done when 'tis done, then t'were well. It were done quickly.', as in, TODAY!"

Bristol: "But you can't, I mean, how are we ever gonna get to see so many cool places and travel around buying stuff that you and Dad never let us have if you ditch your gig?"

Sarah: "Oh, quite the opposite my dear child, sister, child, niece, child, buddy. I'll be cross-crissing every state, from New York to Saskatchewan, bringing the message of do something not what they want if you are a patriotic and then some. You can come too if Dad says yes."

Todd: "Listen up everybody, we just need a little time off to decide if Alaska is really the state it is, or the independent, gun-loving country it should be."

Bristol: "Dad, that's treason!"

Todd: "No, it's a reason without the 't' to take some time off and let those media wolves starve for your Mom's hot copy."

Bristol: "That reminds me of another thing Mrs. Shakespeare wrote on her blog, 'That what we have we prize not to the worth Whiles we enjoy it, but being lack'd and lost, Why, then we rack the value, then we find The virtue that possession would not show us Whiles it was ours.' A priest said that so it must be true."

Todd: "Sounds like gibberish, whatsit supposed to mean?"

Bristol: "Simple, Dad, you don't know what you've got 'till it's gone."

Sarah: "Gone, but certainly not forgotten. Is the baby crying?"

Bristol: "Which one?"